The Prompt: Comparison

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The Prompt 84

I keep coming back to the same thought. Towards simplicity. I want my life, our life, to be simpler, more balanced.

But, I have fallen into the trap of comparing myself with others. Of comparing our life with others.

And thinking, I wish.

I have allowed myself to be sucked behind the facade of social media.

I see tidy homes and calm children; parents holding it all together and not shouting.

I don’t see building projects and mess and stress over homework. I don’t see panic over trying to be in two, or three, places at once. I don’t see the diary clashes and the forgotten appointments.

I don’t see the terror of responsibility and being the adult. Of getting it all wrong.

But, if I actually take a step back from it all. Take a second to see the tiredness and worry and fear in other mums’ eyes. Listen to the tightness in voices; hear the frustration. Read between the lines; understand the reality of the words. Look past the confidence; see the concern.

I realise that we’re not so different after all; I realise just how lucky I am.

And, I have realised that sometimes comparison can be useful.

That looking to others and their journeys can help inform my own. That reading of others quests to simplify, declutter, reevaluate and change; to find joy; can help.

Not paralyze with the fear of inevitable failure, but inspire with positivity.

So, I find myself with a growing pile of motivational and self-help books on my bedside table, replacing my usual fiction fix.

Not a virtual pile on my Kindle, but a real pile! To be read, reread, referenced; flicked through and dipped into.

My natural tendency to go it alone needs to be reined in on this occasion; because this is not a journey to be undertaken alone.

I realise that ultimately my version of a simple life will be mine alone, and should not be compared to others, favourably or otherwise. That I must find a way to balance my reality with what is wanted, needed and wished for.

But, I am ready to take on board all the advice I can get. To compare my ideas with others, to contrast their successes and failures with my own. To find a path that works for me.

To move forward, towards simplicity.
 

mumturnedmom

You can find this weeks #ThePrompt linky here. I do hope this week’s prompt inspired you; I look forward to reading your posts.
 

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17 thoughts on “The Prompt: Comparison”

  1. Oh hon I absolutely adore this post! Change will never happen overnight, but once you’re ready to move forward and truly embrace it, change will happen. Big hugs! Have a great weekend xxx

  2. Great perspective on comparison. With social media being so prevalent, I find myself in the same predicament sometimes–of comparing my experience to others. But just like you, I’ve learned to use it as a positive rather than tear me down. Parenting is such a different experience for all of us, and at the end of the day, what we must do is just try our best and work towards something that works for us and our family.

    I agree with Renee. Change doesn’t happen overnight, but as long as the dedication to do so is there, it’ll happen. And that’s all that matters. Filters and instagram cropping may make parenting look easy and beautiful all the time, but I’m willing to bet your children still love and appreciate you without them.

    Thanks for hosting us this week, Sara! Have a lovely day and a beautiful weekend :)

  3. I totally hear you. It’s never good to compare yourself with other parents because you don’t know what goes on behind closed doors. Everyone knows how hard it is and we all have good and bad days. I like the idea of a simple life too. Hope you work it out and perhaps you can let us in to the secret of how to do it.

  4. I think it’s very easy to get caught up in comparing ourselves to others especially as a parent. It was something I said I would never do before having Monkey but I have to admit I’m guilty. Using it as an opportunity to learn and grow is great though

    1. I think it’s almost impossible to avoid, it seems to be human nature to be hard on ourselves. But, I think we can flip it around x

  5. I both love and hate Pinterest – I find it great for ideas but I also know it pushes a quite possibly unrealistic view of the world … or maybe some people do lead perfect lives? I know I don’t but I have enough years under my belt to slowly start accepting that I am me and I do what I do because I am me and trying to change to that perfect image on Pinterest would mean I was no longer me. Gosh that was waffly but hopefully you get what I mean!

  6. I think many of us fall in to the trap of comparing ourselves, our lives with others. It’s a human thing. But so important to focus on positivity, too – I also have lots of books about mindfulness. They’re proper books too – I love reading fiction on my Kindle but I always feel I need proper paper to flick through with those books – I often find myself randomly flicking through to find something I need at a particular time xx #ThePrompt

    1. Completely agree about proper books for this kind of reading :) It is very human to compare, so often negatively, but there are positives to be found, I think, if we shift our focus x

  7. im the same with comparisons sometimes. Comparisons can be good if they give u ideas and make u strive for better, but bad if they knock your confidence and consume all your thoughts xx

  8. Comparison can be lethal in this am day and age when everything looks so perfect, tidy, neat on social media, doesn’t it? What you see is the tip of the iceberg, the image we are trying to project but we all have dirty dishes, meltdowns (the kids and us!), days when we just give up and messy houses. You’ve really got a great way of thinking that turns a negative into a positive. I agree with you, it’s not a journey to be taken alone, and comparing notes can definitely help!

  9. It is so easy to look at what people post on social media and think why aren’t we like that but pictures of the “perfect” are just pictures, I’d love to see what their houses really look like lol. I like comparisons as long as they are realistic ones xx #love2blog

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