Both boys stopped napping when they turned two. This wasn’t too much of an issue, they were at nursery so I didn’t have to deal with the mid-afternoon grump. And, exhausted after a week at nursery, my husband and I generally managed to get them to take a nap at the weekends (until they were about three).
The wee girl started to fight her naps when she turned two. I had been secretly dreading this.
It had always been a bit of a military operation to get her take one after she dropped to a single, middle of the day nap. Nap had to end at 1.45pm so that we could leave to pick the boys up from school. So, she had to be asleep by 12.15pm. If she wasn’t, I was in trouble.
Having always refused to have my days dictated to by naps; the boys had always napped anywhere, generally in the buggy; I found myself obsessed with getting the wee girl down in her cot by 12.00!
I did of course have an ulterior motive in this.
A nap at home meant an hour and half of quiet time for mummy, with no other distractions. Just the iPad, TV and a cup of tea. It was the only time I really sat down all day; and it gave me a chance to do a quick tidy up/clean the bathroom/make a start on dinner too, which made for an altogether smoother day, and a less stressed mummy.
When the wee girl decided to stop napping I could have cried; actually I did, more than once. 12.00 became 12.30 became 1.00 and soon, there was no time for a nap before the school run.
The Summer holidays put paid to them completely. Who wants to nap when there is fun to be had with your big brothers?
Now, I will admit that there are positives to the end of napping. No more days disrupted by having to find a quiet place to get a grumpy toddler to sleep. No more saying no to play dates that might clash with nap time. No more limiting of activities and classes to those that finish by 11.30.
But!
No more quiet time for mummy. And, to be honest, I’m not coping well with this.
My daughter is full on, and frankly, even if she doesn’t need a nap after running around all morning, mummy does. I find the constant noise very wearing; I crave silence. I love her exuberance, but 12 hours straight is more than anyone can deal with.
And, a full on toddler with no nap makes for a very grumpy toddler by 4pm, and a pretty grumpy mummy. And sometimes a grumpy toddler will fall asleep on their pizza at 6.30…
The problem with no naps, aside from no quiet time and the appearance of the 4 o’clock changeling, is that you get nothing done! Every task is accompanied by a small person asking you questions, pulling at your clothes and generally getting in the way. And, being a goal oriented, over achiever, this is a bit of an issue…
So, in order to maintain my sanity, I shall blame no naps for the messy house, the piles of laundry and running out of bread/milk/fruit/yogurts (substitute for the item you absolutely must have at that moment to appease said non-napping grumpy toddler). I’m hoping that might make me feel a bit better?
And, while I know I should cherish every moment of my daughters toddlerhood, an hour off in the middle of the day would not go amiss :)
When naps end… how do/did you cope?
I am linking up with the very lovely Sam over at And Then The Fun Began for the first week of her brand sparkly new linky The Truth About… It’s a fabulous idea for a linky, do pop over and have a read of the other entries!
I love your expression ‘the four o’clock changeling’ Sara! I always call it the Witching Hour but it’s more than an hour long unfortunately and sometimes it’s not so much grumpiness as just utter mania and screaming (both happy and upset). I have always thought of the lunchtime nap as basically the SAHM’s version of a lunch hour. I was always too nervous about waking them to do anything particularly practical so I just had quiet time which is actually a really necessary battery recharge. JJ gave his up when I was about a month pregnant with EJ and I’ve never experienced tiredness like it. I think I may have actually fallen asleep at my computer the days I *was* at work! EJ is in that transitional phase now but I haven’t been too badly affected by it because of going out to work some days. Thanks so much for linking up and for the plug! I think it’s a great idea myself (;-) ) but I couldn’t be sure that anyone would agree with me! X #thetruthabout
It does get referred to as the witching hour in our house too, but as you say, it goes on for a lot longer than an hour :) I would tip toe around the house!
Z napped till he was about 3.5 and I loved that quiet couple of hours to do pretty much nothing. I’d just faff about and catch up on TV! I have to admit I found it really hard at first and had to think up even more stuff to keep him entertained. We’re just about used to it now. Sort of! :)
I try to get her to at least have some quiet time, but it’s pretty constant!
Oh naps. They are a SAHM’s best friend. When my kids gave up naps, I made them play quietly on their bed for as long as I could get them to and then put a kids show or movie on to finish out the time after that. There is no shame in needing some uninterrupted time to yourself and they really need some time to veg out in the afternoon too. I hope you can find something that will work for you!
She’s getting better at that, but isn’t quite there yet!
I agree with everything you have written here,naps here stopped for Little 2 at the start of the summer holidays at aged 2 and a half everything was fine over the summer, she had a few lie ins and a snooze or two in the car on holiday then my eldest started school now that she has to get up early every day and has started playgroup 2 days she is really tired and could do with napping again but there is no going back, i’ve tried. The worst thing for us is that she was dry at night for 3 months but since she has been so tired this past month she has started wetting the bed as she is too tired to wake, grrr
Oh, yes, we have many days where the wee girl could really do with a nap, but she very rarely falls asleep during the day now :(
So tough to be losing that time in the day. Jessica is now at the stage where she can be quite hit and miss with naps – some days she definitely still needs one though so I try and encourage ‘quiet time’ where she lies down in her cot with some quiet toys/books. She usually does go to sleep but sometimes we lose naptime in favour of an easier and quicker bedtime although we then experience the ‘four o’clock changeling’ as you so beautifully put it. Sophie is not the greatest at naps though – she will sleep in the car but trying to get her to sleep in her cot when we are home is not always an easy process x
The quick bedtime is a definite bonus, but quiet time isn’t really in the wee girls nature…!
That is such a sweet shot of the wee girl! I am dreading that time when Jumpy stops napping. She has been trying to stay awake during her nap time recently…
It changes the dynamic of your day completely!
Ohhhhhhh the end of naptime, it’s so hard! Especially that in between phase when they’re too big for naps, but too small to last all day happily. We coped by putting a proper “quiet time” in place. Amazing how it worked, actually: we talked about how it was going to be quiet time, and I gave a choice of quiet activities ranging from flipping through books, to colouring, to matching games, threading, puzzles, play dough, play dough with stamps, etc. We got comfy in the living room, played the silence game to begin with, laughed if one of us broke it, and then we said “It’s quiet time!”. Sometimes we set up the timer for fun. It got to be quite a nice time where I needed to prepare an activity for her and I got at least some time to myself to read still. Keeping to ourselves became a bit of a game for that special chunk of time. Good luck!
I think I need to work on that, it’s all a little haphazard at the moment :)
Oh I sobbed when the naps ended! My eldest was a fab sleeper, and we managed a (very brief) period of all three napping at the same time. It was amazing!! :) xx
Funnily enough the wee girl was a far better napper than her brothers were, so I had high hopes for them continuing past two…!
I really feel for you – nap time is such a sanity saving oasis for anyone with a toddler. Mine all stopped at 2 as well – which coincided in the case of the first two with the birth of another – just when I could have really used the down time, gah!
My sister managed to enforce an hour’s ‘sofa time’ (aided by CBeebies) for quite a long time after the naps stopped with her two, which did give her a bit of a break. I never successfully introduced this but it might work for you – good luck! #thetruthabout
I can get her to be quiet for a bit, but it doesn’t last for long, I’m hoping she’ll get better at it :)
I dread the day naps will end in my house because I really need the time to myself!
It changes the dynamic if your day, a lot!
Oh I do sympathise Sara! As you say, it was the silence I craved as much as the rest or being able to do things. My mind was crying out for some private space, and I would relish the chance to leave my child with my husband when possible just for a luxurious food shopping trip to Sainsburys (remember them?). Given how much I loathe food shopping it was a good indicator of how at the end of my tether i was.
Hang on in there for a wee while and she’ll be at nursery, then school, then … but I don’t need to tell you that! Probably seems endless at the moment, but if she’s a high achiever like her mum, she’ll be doing well enough to look after you when you are napping in your dotage :) x
Thanks Jo! I don’t think I’d quite realised how much I valued that hour until I didn’t have it anymore :)
We’re in nap limbo at the minute. Some days my little man will have a couple of hours, some days none at all. There’s no real pattern, it’s all a bit hit or miss, but I do miss my quiet time in the days he doesn’t nap. Not helped by come 5pm he’s a grumpy little monster! xx
That’s almost worse, never quite knowing how it’s going to go from one day to the next!
Oh nooo, the end of nap time!!
I was desperately sad when my eldest dropped her afternoon nap. You go from getting next to nothing done to just absolutely nothing!!
My youngest has just turned two so I know it’s on the horizon. I’ll be attempting to incorporate some quiet playtime to compensate. My eldest used to have a regular teddy bear picnic in the afternoon, was snack/playtime and gave me chance to answer some emails as she became quite absorbed with it. Fingers crossed something similar will do the trick!
Good luck. Xx
Love that ‘from getting next to nothing done to just absolutely nothing’! So very true. My daughter doesn’t really do quiet, but we are working on it :)
Ah! I’ve been thinking on this topic for a little bit now as my eldest just dropped her nap, but our youngest still naps (although I suspect that will end soon too).
I will very much miss nap time – very much the new happy hour as a parent.
Yes, happy hour for parents!
I think Molly is getting close to stopping her mid day naps and she heads towards becoming two. As much as it would be lovely to not have to plan every day around that nap time, I am actually scared about how I am going to get things done!! The amount to chores I can now complete in that time is amazing!! It is nice to read that somebody else feels the same x
I know, it was the window of opportunity to get stuff done!
Oh Sara as I’m reading this I can hear my girl one grumbling on the monitor and not sleeping.. I am DREADING the end of the naps!! I feel so selfish too, wanting some me time, but that break in the middle of the day allows me to be a better Mummy the rest of the time by restoring my sanity for the rest of the day. I think we both need to invest in some good DVDs for lunchtime “quiet time” – us and them..!
That’s the thing isn’t it Sarah, that little bit of downtime to make you a happier (and more fun) mummy in the afternoon x
We still have nap time, thank god. However, so much of your post is familiar to me. The full on girl and the craving silence to name two! I don’t think I will cope well at all with no nap time! yikes! #ShareWithMe
It can make for a very long day!
Oh you just made me fears come alive with no naps. I live off knowing my two have a nap during the day so I can work and get things done. And Buba is about to start school and I know he shouldn’t be even having a nap still and MM is not far behind him in stopping either. I don’t know how to cope without a nap. How will ever work again? No more naps bless you….. Thanks for linking up to Share With Me #sharewithme