My Three

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My Three 1

It’s no secret that I’ve been struggling a bit recently. The weather, illness. It’s been tough going. I have found it very difficult to find the positive.

While I read about embrace happy and mindfulness and being present; some days it’s all I can do to get to the end of the day.

I know the moments are there, if I look for them, but I sometimes feel that I shouldn’t have to look for them. It should be easier than this.

I shouldn’t be this tired.

I shouldn’t shout as much.

I shouldn’t wish my days away.

At the weekend I needed to take some photos of the three for my Siblings post. This project is something that I really want to do; to help focus on the good, on the special relationship the three have, to remind myself of the fun and laughter. To embrace the joy and happiness.

They were having none of it.

I’d left it too late in the day, for one reason or another. We were stuck at home. The light wasn’t great and they were playing up.

I know they were tired and simply not interested; but with all the messing around, head shaking, jumping, tongues out, bored faces, silly faces, glazed expressions… I was so exasperated, so frustrated with them that I had a little tantrum of my own, and walked away, sulking.

My children can be perceptive though and for once, knew to leave me alone for a few minutes.

Before coming and apologising and giving me a hug.

Nothing snaps you out of a bad mood faster than your child being the grown up.

When I looked at the photos, they weren’t great. But, they weren’t bad either. Well, a few of them anyway! The ones where the three weren’t just a blur of movement.

They weren’t what I was hoping to include in my Siblings post (I got some much better photos the following morning) but they were just so them. My three.

My exasperating, annoying, entertaining three.

My Three 2

My Three 3

My Three 4

My Three 5

And, for all that the last couple of months have been tough and have pushed me to, and beyond, my limits; they have not been without moments of joy.

When we built a snowman as tall as me, when we painted a rainbow in the snow, when we went out for scrummy breakfasts, when we had movie nights and pizza, when we made snow ice cream and did crafts and played with Lego, when we finally cracked potty training, when my husbands broken hand didn’t need to be pinned.

When the sun shone and the snow sparkled and the children laughed.

I do know that I am lucky, even on those days when I struggle to identify how. All I need to do is look back at the hundreds of photographs I take to see that there are many, many moments that make me lucky. And, the last few weeks have been no different, I’ve just had to try a little harder to find them.

My three; loud, bright, kind, frustrating, exhausting, hilarious. Did I say loud? Because of them, I am lucky beyond words.

Saturday reminded me of that.


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28 thoughts on “My Three”

  1. I struggle with one some days so I can’t imagine what three must be like. I have to say though, I love those photos. Each one made me smile. They are so natural and joyful, I’m glad you came to like them too (although I’m sure it would have also driven me mad taking them when I already had an idea of what I wanted).

    1. Louder? I love the photos too, they are just so typically ‘them’ :) But, yes, trying to take them was a little frustrating!

  2. Potty Mouthed Mummy

    Oh this is so lovely and it’s moments like this which inspired me to want to start the linky. Some days are lovely and perfect. Some days we need to force ourselves to find the beauty that’s there already and I am the guiltiest for not always doing that. Thanks for linking to #countluckystars xxx

  3. Oh sweetie there is so much in this that I can relate to at the mo. It’s the ‘low-level’ illness that I’ve found really tough to cope with, as allergies aside, we’re usually a really healthy family. I’m glad you found the positive, and I love the photos. They’re so natural, which let’s face it, is a rarity in the blog world xxx

    1. That’s what I thought about the photos. I wanted something more ‘polished’ for Siblings, but I wanted to share these ones because they perfectly capture the kids personalities and I love them x

  4. Oh Sara, I can relate to this. Lately I even going to bed thinking, well I can try harder tomorrow, and then tomorrow is kind of a wreck.

    I have 2 kids so I can only imagine the additional chaos of another human, so I feel for you extra! I’m glad you found some goodness in those gorgeous pics – I agree with Renee, I love the natural candid REALness of those faces: happy, bored, annoyed, silly – it really sums up their essence and the reality of life with three young kids.

    Be kind to yourself and I’ll try to do the same :)

    1. Thank you Dana, I wake up in the morning and think, today will be better, and when it’s not it’s hard. But, we’ve got to keep trying, haven’t we?

  5. It’s tough, when so much is going on, and life feels so hard. But spring is here, at least it’s here in the UK so hopefully it will be there soon. And hopefully everyone will be healthier and happier. Lovely pics!

  6. Oh Sara! This is so similar to my post “Parenting: the good, the bad and the ugly”! To be honest I think you’ve reminded me that winter – and particularly this end of it, – is a huge contributing factor in us feeling this way. I get so lonely and frustrated sometimes with the kids. Anyway I think those pictures are adorable – they’re showing their Little cheeky personalities! Hugs Xx

    1. Winter is a real struggle for me, the cold, the dark, it massively affects my mood. It can be very lonely. Hugs to you too, lovely xx

  7. Ah, this is so lovely, Sara. I’ve been having a few days like this recently, too, but when mine are thoughtful, or simply cuddle me, I am me again and I know how lucky I am. Those are gorgeous photos, too x #ShareWithMe

  8. We’ve all been there Sara and it’s tough being a mom when you’re overtired. We keep on getting up and carrying on anyway because that’s part of the job! Happy to hear that you also have so many positives and I love the photos… they show your kids are full of character :o)

  9. Ah lovely, hope things start to pick up for you. I agree, looking at photos of the kids can really cheer you up even when the children themselves are not playing ball. I get so frustrated when I’m trying to get a shot of them for a particular reason! xx

    1. It can be frustrating, but actually looking at these ones cheered me up, even if they weren’t quite what I was looking for!

  10. Such a lovely post. I can imagine with 3 young children there can be times when it is hard, I lose my temper sometimes and I only have one (and then obviously feel guilty as hell for being a stroppy mum). Sometimes it is so easy to lose sight of all the positives, time for Spring and new beginnings xxx

  11. Such a lovely post. It’s so tough sometimes isn’t it. I find removing myself for a few moments to get some perspective helps. Even saying, mummy is going to have a cup of tea, come and talk to me when you are ready. Often the disappearance seems to work. It really is so important to look for the good, those little sweet moments which will make you smile forever. They are all so sweet and look gorgeous together. I used to struggle getting our ‘meandmine’ photo but since using a tripod and selfie stick Lil G and Mr H have calmed somewhat about it and actually want to get involved! Thank you for joining in with #CountLuckyStars x

    1. Taking a minute and a few deep breaths is definitely the way to go. And yes, we do sometimes need to take a moment to look for the good, it’s there, just sometimes well hidden x

  12. Ahhh Sara biggest hugs to you. I have felt very much the same lately. I shout WAY too much and I have had MANY MANY tantrums of my own when the kids and the hubby don’t help me out with something I need four secs of their time. We had one of those today and I down right gave up. I hate that. Because like you said there are great little moments in between that are beautiful and amazing and cherishable. Sometimes life just doesn’t go smoothly for us and that’s hard. I hope it all starts to pick up for you soon. Glad I am not the only one that goes off in a tantrum. lol Thanks for linking up to Share With Me. #sharewithme

    1. Thank you Jenny, it’s hard going sometimes isn’t it. But actually, just writing this post helped a lot. The good stuff is always there if look for it x

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