The Truth About: the truth

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The Truth About The Truth

I wrote a post recently that was the truth; in all its boring, mundane glory. No exaggeration, no embellishment. It was a factual retelling of a particularly frustrating part of my day.

I tried to find the positives, the humour. I just couldn’t.

I felt like I was whining and I couldn’t publish it.

It may have been the truth, but it wasn’t a truth that I wanted to tell, or read.

So, I asked my husband to read it, as I often do when I’m unsure about something I’ve written, and he hated it. Not how it was written, but that I felt that way.

I was touched that this was his primary reaction; although not by his immediate need to fix the problem. So not the point.

But, as I rewrote the post the following day (deleting the particularly whiney bits), the irritation and if I’m being honest, sadness, relating to this particular part of my day, started to ease. And the solution began to come into focus.

I was able to write with a little humour, and know that I was moving forward.

And, that’s the beauty of writing the truth. Sometimes you need to write it, to really see it for what it is, and move on.

As bloggers, even when we tell the truth (the whole truth, and nothing but) we spin a little; we are story tellers after all. We may accentuate the humour, emphasise the positive, reach a conclusion. We post-analyse. Hindsight can’t help but make every story a little different in the retelling.

What we choose to share may ultimately only be a version of the truth; a version with the benefit of time and distance; but the lesson is still there.

And, in learning it ourselves we may just help someone else feel slightly less alone when they are having one of those days themselves.


And then the fun began...  

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37 thoughts on “The Truth About: the truth”

  1. Loved this post and its do true. I rarely do a non positive post because i dont want to moan . I really enjoy your blog and i think we should feel free to write whatever we want on our blogs. I hope that not so good day is rare and you are smiling today x

    1. Thank you very much x The not so good days are rare, and I agree that we should write what we want, I guess it’s about choosing how we write about them x

  2. I can really relate to this post hon. I’ve written posts that border on pure rant that haven’t seen the light of day, or ended up being heavily edited to not be so sad or whiney. The catharsis of writing still comes to me regardless of whether it goes in the blog if that makes sense. Glad your hubby was supportive, and I hope you’re having a better week lovely xxx #thetruthabout

    1. I think that’s absolutely it, isn’t it? Writing it down can give such relief, and even if we choose not to post it, or at least not in it’s original form. Writing is cathartic x

  3. I t hink I know the post that you are referring to Sara and I couldn’t agree more with your sentiment here – sharing the (perhaps slightly grey) truth is absolutely worth doing and DOES release the tension for someone else. We don’t want to read about perfect versions of people because it isn’t real. It just makes us feel inferior somehow. Truth all the way! x

    1. It is, isn’t it? Everyone has bad days, and there are tough parts in each of our lives. Sharing them helps us, and others.

  4. Very true! Blogging is no longer just about writing a journal, but being witty and interesting too. That way, we are storytellers.

    1. It really can be so much more than that, can’t it, and for me that’s part of what makes it so amazing!

  5. I think this is so true Sara! I always, always, no matter how down I might have been feeling when I was prompted to start writing, try and end with an upbeat note, a mission statement or kick up the bum to myself. It definitely helps you focus on the solutions to your own problems – just like my friends/loneliness post the other day – I ended up realising that I needed to make more of an effort myself and be ‘intentional’. I hope it helps other people who read too. I never want to be one of those people who other people think of as a bit of a downer – I do sometimes worry that there will be people who avoid “The Truth about” like the plague and think of it, and me, as negative, but that’s not my intention at all and I know that #thetruthabout tribe see it for what it is – a place to share and laugh and support and reassure each other. X

    1. We definitely see #TTA for what it is Sam, and it’s lovely to know that there is support out there :) I do think it’s really important to think about how we tell our stories. Like you, I always want there to be a positive, a way forward, or at the very least a recognition that things will get better and that none of us are alone. I often wait until I’ve worked through something before I blog about it, but writing it all down really helps me to focus on the solutions x

  6. I love this post! I try not to write too many negative pieces in the blog as well (for the same reason that you have: I don’t want to sound whiny), but as a blogger and a writer, I must admit: writing truly refocuses my perspective on a subject. Whether it’d be motherhood or writer’s block, simply putting thoughts on paper is therapeutic. And you’re absolutely right: seeing the truth on paper, reading your own words and hearing them being said truly hones its focus, and eventually lets us move on. Thanks for sharing!

    1. I always kept diaries when I was younger, and while they are whiney and angsty and teenage, it always helped me to write things down. It is therapeutic. And, I do find that reading my own words brings me a new perspective.

  7. So true. As a blogger I rarely write about anything negative, but I think it helps me keep things in perspective, all the things I love and enjoy, rather than the things that get me down.

    #Brilliantblogposts

    1. Absolutely, and I think that the positive posts are so important as they help remind all of us that, even on our worst days, it’s not all bad x

  8. So true, I wrote a post not long ago that was very honest. It got very mixed reviews, some said this was exactly how they felt but others said they were annoyed by my opinion. I wasnt really sure how to take it. It actually made me second guess if I should keep writing. At the end of the day I suppose being a blogger is entirely about honest opinions anymore. Yes you need to be honest but sometimes the pure honest truth isnt what people want.

    1. No one is going to like, or agree with, everything we write all the time. But it is a tricky one, and I will admit that I have a tendency to err on the side of non-contentious! I am always honest in my opinions, but I do also try to be balanced, it’s a fine line to tread isn’t it?! I’d love to read the post you’re referring to, do leave me a link x

  9. Sing it, sister! 100% with you. I try to edge on the humorous side of things but sometimes I want to write and just can’t see the funny. It’s healing to have a good bitch and moan every now and again. Often I store those posts and revisit them a few days later, able to find the funny and feel better overall. Great post!
    #brilliantblogposts

    1. Exactly, I think simply writing it down helps massively. Then, leave it for a bit before re-reading. Amazing what a bit of distance does for perspective; and it can turn a moan filled post into a really useful one!

  10. I’ve done this in the past – written a post thinking it was full of honesty and humour and when I’ve read it back I’ve realised its just full of sadness. I found it therapeutic after writing it but I do chicken out writing stuff that’s too too raw.

    1. I definitely err on the side of positive, but life isn’t always like that, and sometimes you need to write how you feel. But, I definitely think that you can choose how to do that, and sometimes the raw post is the perfect precursor for the perfect one.

  11. I once written a post and I got an email from my husband telling me that I am a liar. Thats how we roll here. What he didnt know is that that post is how I saw things. There are things inside me that influence how I wrote it and there are influences in him that might think that they are not what he remembers them. Needless to say our marriage in on the rocks and well I am a liar in my husband’s eye. Sadly that is the truth. #sharewithme

    1. Oh, Merlinda, I’m so sorry. It’s very hard when people see different truths in the same situation, and sadly it is often the case x

  12. We all like to offer up the best version of ourselves through our blog and sometimes I self edit too much as I have strong feeling about particular issues about living in America (politics, racial tensions etc) and thought maybe I should not write about it – but then I decided that I should not keep my voice quiet if it means something to me.
    Loved your post – and your honesty!

    1. I’ve loved the posts you’ve written about current events here in the US. I wrote about gun control last year, and I will admit I was quite nervous before I published it. I think we need to write about what is important to us, we all have a voice x

  13. Fiona @ Free Range Chick

    Ain’t that the truth, Sara? There are so many posts that I’ve started, and they’ve largely served as a way to vent something. They’ve never made it to the final cut (although some of the stuff that does make it to publication is also a little questionable!), and this is a good thing because they did read badly.

    Since I was teenager I have used writing as a way to process things. It works for me. Getting thoughts down on paper is therapeutic for me. It isn’t for everyone, but bloggers are writers and probably all have this trait in common.

    The ranty, serious posts that I write are always shrouded by humour. I don’t know why I do this. I am a little loathed to write about negative stuff, even when I AM writing about negative stuff. Anyway, this comment is going on and on. I blame it on In The Night Garden, which is on in the background while my 3-y3-year old is headbutting me. Maybe I’ll put this phone down now! X

  14. Izzie Anderton

    Brilliant post Sara… we’ve all written the ranty-type of blog and added a little humour after the event. I like to think it makes the situation more bearable, even if it was pretty awful at the time. I admire your honesty x

    1. You’re right, it takes the edge off it doesn’t it, and lets us start to move on from it x Thank you Izzie x

  15. This is so true Sara. My whole blog is based on the premise that most things can seem funny in hindsight. I now try and see the humour on the spot – if I think about the blog I will make out of it, it really helps get me through! x

  16. Sometimes it feels good to say the truth and then regroup. I love this post hunny. I always feel better after write the good, the bad, the ugly, and the funny. That’s the beauty of having our blogs. lol Thanks for linking up to Share With Me. Happy Easter! #sharewithme

  17. Hi -I agree that writing things down really helps – I have so much that is never finished, but sometimes I do get a bit whingy and whiny… I am working at bringing out my inner comedienne! I have been an ex-pat for ages too and ready for a move home, at least for the next phase! xoxox

  18. Brilliant, brilliant post Sara. I have started to write posts so many time and then just left it – mainly because I can’t stand negativity and feel that it is not constructive if I am moaning or whining! I usually write it a bit later once I have thought it through and tried to look at things from a different angle. Thank you for linking to #PoCoLo x

  19. What a lovely, positive and – er – TRUE post! I know I always write the truth, but I do tell a story in a certain way – to enhance the funny, the positive and sometimes the negative. To tell a story perfectly straight can sometimes be boring.
    What is it about husbands? Why do they always want to find a solution? Sometimes I wish mine would just let me moan and wallow! Sometimes I don’t want a solution!

  20. Really enjoyed reading this because I can relate. I find that certain posts I write come across whiney and sometime I don’t publish it because I want my blog to be a positive platform. Its hard to find a balance without glossing things up a bit for the online world.

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